August 02, 2005
The greatest story ever Vogued
Fellow Brooklynite Majikthise comments on an extremely cheesy apparition of Jesus in Frank Sinatra's hometown of Hoboken, New Jersey. Ring-a-ding-ding, pally!
This, however, is not the cheesiest piece of religious kitsch I have seen lately. No, that no-prize has to go to the good people at Nelson Bibles. After market research indicated that the reason teenagers don't read the Bible is because "it's too big and freaky-looking", Nelson Bibles decided to repackage the Bible to resemble a fashion magazine.
Honest. Here, take a look:
Yes, gaze upon it with wonder. It doesn't have the classic Vogue headline "Fifty Ways To Drive Your Man WILD In Bed", but I'm sure that's just an oversight.
Nelson Bibles is also trying to break into the "urban" market, with...
I'm surprised they didn't call it WORD.
Peace, y'all.
Posted by coyu at August 2, 2005 02:20 AM"I'm surprised they didn't call it WORD."
That's cause they wanted to keep it REAL.
Posted by: Patrick Banks at August 2, 2005 05:02 PMActually, I like Carlos' version better.
Posted by: Bernard Guerrero at August 3, 2005 01:02 AMThat's because we're old school, Bernard.
I like the contrast between the serious/sullen expressions on the cover of REAL versus REVOLVE's toothy smiles. The broken grammar and the lone white guy standing well to the back are also amusing.
Now I'm waiting for the WIRED knock-off -- AWAKE? no, that's been taken -- and the MAXIM clone.
Posted by: Carlos at August 3, 2005 01:43 AMActually, Revolve sells well in secular-hedonistic Toronto. It's almost certainly a big seller in the United States.
Posted by: Randy McDonald at August 4, 2005 04:38 PMRandy, I'm not saying it's not a big seller. Lots of things are big sellers. Nelson Bibles' market research seems to have been spot-on, and good for them!
I'm saying it's amazingly kitschy. Like having a TV car salesman dress up as Jesus for the big Easter blowout. (I am still waiting for that one, and similarly for the Martin Luther King holiday.)
But who knows? The Renaissance managed to combine ostentatious displays of wealth with religious piety in an artistically successful manner. Perhaps future generations will regard the mixture of commercialism and piety displayed by REVOLVE, REFUEL, REAL et cetera in the same way.
Posted by: Carlos at August 4, 2005 04:50 PMOld school. All I can picture is Cameo breaking out into:
"Now all you sucka Pro-phets
Who think you're fly
There's got to be a reason
And we know the reason why..."