Snow Again?

Winter Wonderland

Dec 1st

8 P.M. It started to snow. The first of the season. The wife and I took our cocktails and sat by the window, watching the snowflakes drift down all over the area. It was beautiful!

Dec 9th

We awoke to a big beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Every tree and shrub with a beautiful white mantel. I shoveled snow for the first time in years and loved it. I did both the driveway and the sidewalk. Later, the snowplow came aiong and coverd up the sidewalk with compacted snow from the street, so I shoveled it again.

Dec 12th

The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Oh well, I'm sure we will get some more before the lovely winter in through.

Dec 14th

It snowed 8 inches last night and the temperature dropped to 20 degrees below zero. Shoveled the driveway and sidewalk and the snowplow came by and did its trick again.

Dec 15th

Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer so I can drive in the snow. Bought snow tires for the wife's car.

Dec 16th

Fell on my ass on the ice on the driveway. All that did was hurt my feelings.

Dec 17th

Still cold (below zero in the A.M.) and the icy roads make for very tough driving.

Dec 20th

Had another 14 inches of that white shit last night. More shoveling in store for me today. That damned snowplow came by twice today.

Dec 22nd

We are assured of a white Christmas because another 13 inches of that white shit fell today and with the freezing weather it won't melt till August. Got all dressed up to go out and shovel (boots, jumpsuit, heavy jacket, earmuffs, gloves, etc) and got the urge to pee.

Dec 23rd

Was going to go ice fishing today but my worms froze and I didn't want the fish breaking their teeth on my bait.

Dec 24th

If I ever catch that son-of-a-bitch that drives that snowplow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls. I think he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling snow and then comes down the street at 100 MPH and throws snow all over what used to be my lawn.

Dec 25th

Merry Christmas. They predicted 28 more inches of that f...... white stuff tonight. Do they know how many shovels full of snow 28 inches is? To hell with Santa, he doesn't have to shovel that white shit. The snowplow driver came by asking for a donation. I hit that son-of-a-bitch in the head with my snow shovel.

Dec 26th

We got another 25 inches of the same. I must be going blind or have a severe case of cabin fever because my wife is starting to look good to me.

Dec 27th

The toilet froze. If you go outside, don't eat the yellow snow!

Dec 28th

I set fire to the house. Now that white shit won't cling to the roof!

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